i have 12 minutes on this library computer. the clock is actually ticking in my sight. 11 minutes. today is my day off and i am being rushed by a fricking clock on my screen. sabbath? shabbot shalom - shabbot not. i am foolishly jealous of my dog who is put in her kennel, near a window, with two cozy blankets, AND A TREAT everyday for several hours. all she can do in said kennel is stand up, sleep, and be. sure, she probably barks at some passing buses - but she doesn't entertain herself, eat, worry about squirrels. nothing. she experiences authentic quiet time and just time FOR.WITH.BY.TO.IN.AROUND.UNDER.OVER.NEAR.IN THE CENTER of herself.
good lord. i wish someone would give me a bite-sized treat and close the door on me. put me in my sabbath kennel to not DO anything. no magazines, no books, no stEWpid t.v., no npr, no nothing. no to-do lists. no would like to do lists. no want to call lists. no hope to hear from lists. no want to look up on the internet lists. no nothing.
and now there is 6 minutes and counting. i will be out and about.
sabbathing my day away. hm... i think i need God to bludgeon me with something to get me DOWN. there is a funny prayer. what am i smoking? just lie the frick down.
oh i just got the 5 minute alarm....must go. hm.
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